random memes }

House not home

Lived twenty years in this house. More of my life than any other place.

Last weekend, spent time and energy painting my bedroom in Ultra Pure White. First comment, I needed to hang pictures on the wall. No desire.

For me this is just a house, not a home. This is the place where I raised my kids. They have strong positive emotions tied to this place. Becoming adults, they have started to move on - as they should. To my grandson, this is a place where he has always been happy and safe. To me this is just an empty space.

Moved small stuff out of the room before painting. When done, liked the uncluttered look, moved little back. Accumulated odds and ends, and anachronisms did not come back. (Odd to realize an LED clock/radio and a docked iPod were obsolete.)

My five year old grandson asked about and listed every missing item. ("Where is it? Why is it gone? That goes there and ..."). He seems disturbed by the changes.

But I have no fondness for this place.